creativity without limits
    
   
   
    Trancoso was a great place for the kids. It took them no time at all to adapt to a life totally different from what they had known in Nepal and to turn into regular village brats. Together with their local friends they fought the kids of the Brazilian tourist who spent summer vacation in Trancoso.    
    I couldn't myself imagine a better place for them to grow up: Few daily hours of school, kids and animals galore, the whole village and its vincinity a great playground surrounded by an opulent nature, and the beach only a few minutes away. Every day was filled with fun, play and adventures. Toys were practically unknown in Trancoso, and those that were around usually ended up forgotten in some backyard corner, exposed to sun and rain. Nature and the kid's tremendous creativity supplied all they needed to play and have fun.    
         
    My kids both enjoyed the practically unlimited freedom to come and go as they pleased. Though when they got older, to his big sister's great annoyance Rashid picked up the local habit of spying on her 'cause a girl's moral supposedly is her brother's responsibility. He'd come running home to tell me whenever he saw Fatima together with a boy.    
    The only time the children actually spent at home was when they were asleep. I never tried to force any of my kids to go to sleep at any certain hour, this is both against nature and common sense. Kids are able to decide for themselves when it's time to turn in, which they'll do when they feel tired. Even if they have to get up early next morning, they'll soon find their own rhythm and will not neglect the demands of their bodies. They showed up to eat a bite, but as often they ate rice and beans at some friend's home.    
         
    Possibilities for youngsters to divert themselves were virtually unlimited in Trancoso. Together with their friends they went to gather wild fruit, attend festas and parties, cooked the tiny fish and crabs they had caught or prepared a churrasco, played snooker in the tiny local bars, they danced, rode horses, climbed trees and swam to their heart's content.    
    On Sundays they loved to gather in a mixed group of boys and girls of all different ages, from toddlers and small babies in the arms elder siblings to teenage girls who'd be mothers themselves soon, for a cozinado. The lot would pass from house to house and ask for some edibles like pasta, rice, vegetables, onions, fish or meat. Parents of one of the kids would grant them permission to use their kitchen, usually a very basic, self-constructed wood fire affair out in the backyard or a stove run from a gas cylinder, and they'd spend the whole day alternately preparing and eating the collected foodstuffs. What a great way to acquaint themselves with the intricacies of cooking. I'll always remember an argument between Fatima and a friend who insisted that it was possible to cook rice without adding water or any other liquid. They quickly learned who was right.    
    On rainy days, they sometimes got out their "Lego" toys out and played with their friends on the platform in the restaurant. Rainfall was rare, but as heavy as one imagines in the tropics. Local housewives put their plants outside for a cleaning shower, and soccer seemed to be even more popular with the quadrado turned into a seascape.    
    Once in a while we thought we should play a game or something with our kids, as it is the custom in western societies. The youngsters were not happy, but rather embarrassed, and run off as soon as was possible without being impolite. I gave it some thought, and my conclusion was that actually this shared activities are only necessary in places where kids can't have fun on their own. In a place like Trancoso, it would be a futile exercise and not make much sense.    
         
    I got many pics showing how the kids grew up and lived in Brazil, so I'll present them on a separate page rather than stuffing them all unto this one, forcing my visitors to wait ages for everything to load. Rashid and his best mate Quito will lead you to the photo section, just click on their pic below.    
         
   
 
    
   
   
         
   
Fatima and Rashid often went to steal fruit from neighborhood backyards and gardens along with their native friends. It was not only the fruit, it was the dare as well, and the fun. Of course I never knew about such activities back then, my daughter only told me many years later. She still insists that the stolen bananas used to taste far better than the bought ones at our place.
   
         
   
Fatima was an expert at climbing trees, she went so far up those huge old ones that I could hardly stand it to look up at her. I never said a thing though, for fear of making her feel insecure and loosing her balance. One of Fatima's friends did fall from a tree, the poor little girl fell so unlucky that she got impaled on a fence and lost her life.
    
   
It was a common sight in Trancoso to see a procession of grieving relatives carrying a small white casket past our front door on the way to the village church. It was hard to get used to, and I felt a . One of Rashid's best friends died of some disease, he got treated in various hospitals in different states, but to no avail. He was a sweet lad of 10 years
    
   
   
   
You can either live your life unhampered and free, assume responsibility for what you do and accept the risks involved, including accidents and unforeseen confrontations with dangers, even with death. Or you can be a prisoner of your fears, live an unexciting life in a completely safe environment, and to top it pay the insurance companies a fortune to have every eventuality covered. You might reach a higher age choosing the first option, but that doesn't mean you lived more, you might not even have really lived at all.
    
    No question what I chose for myself, and I lived through many adventures. In my teens, I sometimes was maybe a bit too reckless, but, thanks God, always got away unharmed.    
         
   
I let my kids have a lot of freedom too, but never failed to teach them to be careful and act responsible. I wished for them to become independent, strong individuals with a mind of their own.
    
   
   
   
Of course, I never knew half of what they were up to in Trancoso. Many years later Rashid once mentioned how he and his friends once drove a car into the river and he had thought this might be his last moment on earth.
   
         
         
    Ahmed was only three years old when I left my psycho ex-husband and Brazil. As he was too small to be asked his opinion, I could easily take him with me. Fatima and Rashid outright refused to leave Trancoso, the place where they felt so much at home. As it was very difficult for me to get away at all and in one piece, I couldn't force them to come along.    
    Fate sometimes is not what we'd choose, we can do nothing but make the best out of it.    
         
    I felt very bad for Ahmed not being able to grow up in a place where kids can be kids, run free, play and have adventures. Switzerland, apart from the material benefits, which never were too important for me, is one of the worst places for children to live. Ahmed changed within just a few years from an ever laughing bundle of energy into a quiet and withdrawn little boy.    
    Fatima and Rashid stood in Trancoso until their teens. Rashid came to Switzerland when he was fourteen and Fatima a year later, both bearing psychic scars from there father's violent, erratic behavior. In Switzerland they learned a profession and now work. I wish for all my kids that they will spend their lives in a country where they are free to be themselves, where money and status are not as important as they are in western industrialized nations, a place where they can live happily. One or the other might go back to live in Brazil.